I have 2 children. A boy, Ian, who is 11 and a girl, Eve, who is 4.
Ian is my sweet, sensitive child who gets straight A's without trying, plays football, baseball, skateboards and has a lot of friends who I like too. He is sensitive and caring, he grew up afraid to say a bad word and afraid to hurt mommy's feelings.
My daughter however, is bold, explosive, "chemical" as my husband says. She flies off the handle with the least bit of provocation. She tortures her brother. She doesn't care about getting into trouble, says "I hate you mommy", slams her bedroom door, talks back constantly and is always challenging me. Is this normal 4 year old behavior???
Don't get me wrong- she has her wonderful qualities: a splendid imagination, she is very loving- when she wants to be;), passionate, determined and makes me laugh like no one else and deep (very deep!) inside- she is soft and sweet.
So, is this the boy- girl thing or the second child syndrome? I understand that they are 2 different people but they are so completely opposite, I wonder what happened!!? And yes, they have the same father! A lot of my friends have girls and say that girls are just different..... I don't know. 
Please, if you find out the answer to "Is this normal 4 year old behavior?" - let me know!! I have an almost 4 year old girl who sounds just like yours. She has been that way from birth, and (probably because of her personality) she is the only child we will have. You are very fortunate to have Ian for balance and sanity!
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